


X

by MiceAndIce



Category: Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Asexual Awareness Week, Asexual Sherlock, Attempt at Humor, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-27
Updated: 2014-10-27
Packaged: 2018-02-22 22:22:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2523830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiceAndIce/pseuds/MiceAndIce
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock has no time for Watson's sexual nonsense.</p>
            </blockquote>





	X

**Author's Note:**

> You'll never take asexual Sherlock Holmes away from me. Never.

"...and that is why- John? John, are you even listening to me?"

"Hm? Oh, yes, Sherlock, of course, brilliant, brilliant..." said John, quite dreamily if Sherlock had to say. The doctor kept staring at the women on the stage. And staring. And staring. More staring. Perhaps Sherlock had overestimated John's ability to control himself.

"John," said Sherlock, snapping his fingers in front of the man's face. "I need assistance, preferably yours, to catch this man. Do you understand our plan?"

"I..." One of the women on stage winked at the two men. She twirled around a pole, kicked up her leg, and blew a kiss at the good old doctor. "Um, I..."

John, shaking his head, finally managed to pull himself away from the dancing ladies and stopped gawking at them. "Sorry, Sherlock, could you repeat what you said?"

An exaggerated groan issued from Sherlock's lips.

"Come along, John. I will not bother to waste my time repeating myself again until we are in a place that allows for the blood to rush back into your head from whatever extremities your life liquid is currently concentrated at." At this insult, John's face flushed a light shade of pink, and he spat out flustered comeback.

"Oh, come off your high horse! We're in one of the classiest strip clubs in England; you can't tell me that you're completely unaffected by the women here!"

"I am, and, since we're on a case here, we should get moving." Sherlock made to leave, but John grabbed his coat sleeve.

"Woah, wait, come on, you can't be serious?"

Sherlock sighed.

Then, he pushed two large books into John's hands.

"The Kinsey Reports," Sherlock informed John. "Both the  _Sexual Behavior in the Human Male_ and  _Sexual Behavior in the Human Female._ Read them."

"Sherlock, where did you get-"

"Now, John, I know there are some criticisms to be made pertaining to Kinsey's population samples and biases involved and other various factors-"

"Sherlock, I don't-"

"The sexuality scale he discusses, it ranges from zero to six, and there's an interesting look into a category that Kinsey labels 'X' that you may want to look into-"

"Sherlock-"

"And now, John," the genius said as he clasped John's shoulders and looked somewhere beyond the man. "We continue the hunt."

* * *

And that was the story of how Sherlock used his asexy powers to conjure up two books and help educate a man.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I never thought I'd ever use the word "asexy," but it just feels right in that sentence. Anywho, this was done for fun and hardly proofread, so if you spot any embarrassing mistakes, I would appreciate you telling me about them.


End file.
